Pride and Prejudice and Zombies

**Spoiler Alert**

Director: Burr Steers/Starring: Sam Riley, Lily James, Charles Dance, Sally Phillips, Lena Headey, Douglas Booth and Jack Huston

There are certain novels and plays that have been adapted--over-adapted--for the big screen. Two of them; Hamlet and Pride and Prejudice, have been interpreted so many times as to be nauseating. With Jane Austen film adaptation fatigue now in full effect, along comes Pride and Prejudice and Zombies; a re-imagining of the Austen classic which pits the now-famous characters against--what else; zombies. The idea seemed inspired and fun and I thought it would be a sure winner. Director Burr Steers' film, based on the novel by Seth Grahame-Smith, may remind one of another film adapted from another of the author's works: Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter. Unfortunately, like AL: VH, Steers' film lacks what it needs most: a mirthful, tongue-in-cheek spirit that has little time for earnestness. The title in Steers' film suggests that nothing in the story will be serious, yet that is the direction to which the narrative stubbornly leads; to my personal regret and the filmmaker's peril.

Having read Austen's novel in college and having sat through several big screen iterations, the last thing I need in my lifetime is another straight interpretation. Though I really like film adaptations of Austen's other novels, I feel I've had my fill of corsets, rigid social customs and women fixated on finding their ideal mates. What I wanted to see was something satirical and funny. To sum up the major flaws in this film: it's too serious and too unaware of its need to be outrageously silly. What I wanted was Monty Python but what I got was, well, more Jane Austen.

I won't synopsize the story because I feel most people have some knowledge of the characters and plot from the book or other filmic adaptations. I'll try to just explain how zombies figure into the narrative.
We learn at the beginning of the film that the robust, 18th century sea trade brought a plague to England's shores. Quickly reaching pandemic proportions, the plague spread, causing those infected to become living, breathing corpses hell-bent on devouring the non-infected populace. During this time, a massive wall was erected around the city of London to protect its citizens from the roving, zombie hordes.

Because the upper classes found themselves essentially imprisoned, distractions became an imperative. As a result, a self-improvement movement began in earnest in the form of martial arts. While the gentry became adept in the Japanese martial arts, the less genteel; such as the Bennet sisters, chose the Chinese varieties.

One of the more inspired scenes in the film is our first glimpse of the Bennet sisters; a few of the protagonists of Austen's story. Rather than sitting around, crocheting or knitting or reading poetry, as Austen's female characters are wont to do, Steers' Bennets are bad-asses who sit in a circle; maintaining weapons; sharpening long blades and tending to pistols. Underneath their proper, period-appropriate dresses, the young women wear sheaths for their blades on their very sexy stockings.

It is quite amusing to hear the narrator mention a zombie attack during a game of whist; the default card game of 19th century European novels. While the Bennet sisters and guests enjoy a hand; Austen's dour, male hero; Mr. Darcy (Sam Riley), barges into the room and unleashes a vial of flies. He explains to the bewildered gathering that the flies will immediately alight on rotting flesh, thus enabling the party to identify any zombie in their midst. When the flys' buzzing stops, the ominous silence alerts everyone to the presence of an infected party, which Mr. Darcy dispatches without much remorse or regret.

As the novel's narrative particulars proceed, the un-dead threaten to overrun the countryside and the country itself. Before long, Mr. Darcy and Elizabeth Bennet (Lily James) begin to see four mysterious, black-clad horsemen. It is explained in the story that the riders may be the biblical Four Horsemen, whose appearances may herald the coming of a zombie apocalypse.

When not concerning themselves with their romantic pursuits, the Bennet sisters apply their considerable martial skills to slashing and smashing zombie skulls.

As the zombies overrun London and the countryside, the only safe haven for the living lies across a river where only a single bridge serves as means of protection from the un-dead legions. A climactic moment takes place on said bridge as Mr. Darcy and Elizabeth try desperately to cross before the army detonates explosives, which serve as a fail-safe method for keeping the zombie army at bay.

Other than the zombie angle, which quickly loses its novelty, there isn't much to recommend the film. And though the Bennet sisters and Mr. Darcy adroitly remove heads from bodies, the action scenes are nothing much. Zombies roaming through Austen's world is a juicy gag that never becomes a gag; merely material with unrealized potential.

Watching Riley play Mr. Darcy with an irony-free earnestness was one more bummer that sponged all the fun out of the movie. How can anyone be in a flick called Pride and Prejudice and Zombies with a straight face? Couldn't Burr Steers and Seth Grahame Smith have pulled out all the stops and given us something anarchically loony?

Well, vampires have become passe and zombies are on their way out. What can we expect next? Crime and Punishment with evil aliens? War and Peace and Werewolves? Stay tuned.