Mother's Day

**Spoiler Alert**

Director: Garry Marshall/Starring: Jennifer Aniston, Julia Roberts, Kate Hudson, Jason Sudeikis, Timothy Olyphant, Britt Robertson, Hector Elizondo, Margo Martindale, Robert Pine, Aasif Mandvi and Ella Anderson

I know what you're probably thinking; why the hell see any Garry Marshall movie when his last two holiday movies; New Year's Eve and Valentine's Day sucked tragically? Truth be known, I've seen everything else at the theaters and I needed one last posting for the month. Better movies await me in May but since I spilled clams for this nonsense, I may as well say something about it. But what can one express about any Garry Marshall movie, particularly Mother's Day, except to say it belongs on cable TV, a trans-oceanic flight or someplace where it can help an insomniac or anesthetize a PTSD person?
At the screening I attended, a passel of geriatrics showed up; probably hoping to see something inoffensive, mildly amusing and profanity-free. The film meets most of those criteria (only a few swear words) but what I found really surprising is that Marshall's so-called comedy couldn't even make the old folks laugh (well, maybe they chuckled once).

Like the aforementioned movies in this trilogy (geez, I hope it's only a trilogy), Marshall crowds his story with multiple characters and multiple narrative threads though even a spider monkey in a coma could plot out every story-line knowing little about the characters. Plot-twists and unexpected story developments aren't Marshall's forte.

The characters are as follows:

Sandy (Jennifer Aniston) and Henry (Timothy Olyphant-wasted badly here) are an attractive forty-something couple in the throes of divorce. Sandy hopes of reconciliation are dashed when Henry surprises her with news of his elopement to a young, sexy twenty-something. The conflict here is Sandy's insecurity about becoming marginalized as her two sons find living with their dad and his new wife irresistible. Of course Henry's attractive new wife is another source of anxiety for her, as is being single.

Jesse (Kate Hudson) is married to an Indian/American named Russell (Aasif Mandvi); a fact her semi-estranged and slightly bigoted parents; Flo (Margo Martindale) and Earl (Robert Pine) are unaware of. Complicating the matter are Jesse and Russell's two children and her sister/next door neighbor Gabi (Sarah Chalke); who is hiding a secret of her own; namely her marriage to a woman. The fact that Flo and Earl have surprised Jesse, Russell and Gabi with a visit should be fertile territory for some laughs and comic situations. Never happens. Flo and Earl are one-dimensional, lazily-drawn southern stereotypes whose bigotry should be cause for drama rather than laughs.

Miranda (Julia Roberts) is the hostess of her own successful home-shopping channel. Single and childless, her connection to another character is revealed later in the film. There is very little else one need know about her.

Bradley (Jason Sudeikis; frittering time away here) is a widower whose late wife Dana (cameo by Jennifer Garner) died while serving as a Marine in Afghanistan (the fact that she was a soldier is a shameless ploy to tug on our heartstrings). His conflict is being a single parent and a father to two daughters; one of whom is a teenager who shows a burgeoning interest in boys, which brings Bradley untold anxiety.

Kristin (Britt Robertson) and Zack (Jake Whitehall); are a young, twenty-something couple with a kid. Though Kristin is happy with Zack, she has yet to commit to marriage, which he is only too happy to consummate. Zack, meanwhile, pursues a career as a stand-up comic (his stage routine is bland) when he isn't tending bar. The movie seems to forget at times these two characters exist; abandoning them for long stretches, only to return to them when we're long past caring about them. It is also revealed that Kristin was adopted and has an opportunity to meet her biological mother. The identity of said mother is withheld until later, which is supposed to be a shocking revelation.

Of course the various characters tend to intermingle at times; Sandy socializes with Kristin and Jesse at the park while the children frolic. Bradley runs into Sandy at a supermarket when a cashier runs a price-check on his daughter's tampons (this gag is old; it was funnier in Mr. Mom years ago, when it was original), which gives them the opportunity to meet-cute.

Having a crude understanding of the characters shouldn't keep you from knowing where the paved narrative trails will lead. For instance, which two single people will most likely end up together? Match a single mom with a motherless young woman. Which characters might they be? Will the bigoted hicks from the south become enlightened and accept their in-laws? If you don't where the movie will go, you've dozed off or just don't care enough to pay attention, or both.

Being a Garry Marshall film, one knows the story will have all the edges of a cotton ball. Marshall ensures no one will be offended or upset or have to think much. I guess we're supposed to just enjoy watching a parade of stars try to turn lint into gold thread. If the situations can't be original or inspired, why can't the humor be humorous?

No one seems to be able to rise above the mundane material. Hector Elizondo can be very amusing if given something good to work with but here he can only make do with crusts of bread. Timothy Olyphant seems all wrong for this kind of movie; he needs something darker and more dramatic to be truly affective. Though some cast members deserve better; others, like femme-hacks Kate Hudson, Jennifer Aniston and Julia Roberts, seem like ideal choices for this unfunny, crushingly dull, tenaciously empty-headed comedy/drama.

It's impossible to say anything good about the film, or at least something that isn't snarky so I'll leave it alone and let my mind purge the movie from my memory, which should take only...let's see...another second...there. Done.

Race

**Spoiler Alert**

Director: Stephen Hopkins/Starring: Stephan James, Jason Sudeikis, Jeremy Irons, William Hurt, Carice van Houten, Barnaby Metschurat and Shanice Banton

I'm always leery of Hollywood sports biopics. They always seem to slide into sentimental, Disney-esque, feel-good tripe. I had such misgivings before I saw Race; director Stephen Hopkins' film on the great Jesse Owens, who electrified the world by winning four gold medals at the 1936 Berlin Olympics. But I discovered the film had greater ambitions and though it celebrates Owen's triumphant displays of athleticism, it doesn't cower from what much of the film is about: racism and discrimination. And though we expect to see scenes of ugly, race hatred in Nazi Germany, Hopkins' story doesn't let America off the hook for its own appalling race relations. As stated in the film, the situation for blacks in Germany was hardly different than in the states, where institutionalized racism was the norm.

But what is surprising about Hopkins' moving film is that it is really three stories in one; all reflecting an overarching racial theme. One of course is Jesse Owens' Olympian feats; another is American Olympic committee representative Avery Brundage (Jeremy Irons) and his struggle to keep America from boycotting the Berlin Games while yet another story depicts legendary German filmmaker Leni Riefenstahl's efforts to make her now famous Olympic film. Riefenstahl, played with gusto by Carice van Houten, encounters the formidable, Nazi propaganda machine in the form of sinister Joseph Goebbels; who is intent on using the games to promote the party's platform on Aryan, racial superiority. The film is aptly christened, for the word race applies to the story in several ways.

Another film featuring several narrative streams might lose sight of one at the expense of another. Hopkins and screenwriters Joe Shrapnel and Anna Waterhouse manage to make the plot and its subplots cohere into one affective story and in the process we learn much about the racial politics surrounding the '36 Olympics.

The story doesn't begin with Owens' childhood but the days leading up to his departure for Ohio State University. Early on we get a glimpse of his family life, where the struggle to make ends meet in Depression-era Cleveland is a constant. Owens' opportunity to attend college is made possible by his astonishing high school track and field accomplishments.

After Owens (Stephan James) arrives on the University campus, he meets the track and field coach Larry Snyder (Jason Sudeikis); whose own Olympian opportunity was dashed by an accident that left unable to compete in the 1924 Games. In the awkward first meeting, Snyder offers Owens a chance to make the Olympic team for the Berlin games, which are several years in the future. Owens immediately accepts but neglects to mention his girlfriend and his child, who he must support with his meager gas station pay. But though Owens promises Snyder he will devote the majority of his time to track and field, he finds the demands of supporting his child and girlfriend Ruth (Shanice Banton) and attending track practice to be overwhelming. Snyder is irked to find Owens neglected to divulge his family situation but is nevertheless sympathetic; securing him a bogus campus job for a livable wage that will allow him more track time.

The early scenes between Owens and Snyder are bracing for their tension, as the coach's past and his heavy drinking clash with Owens frustrations with campus bigotry and Ohio's own brand of segregation. We see that Jim Crow attitudes and practices were hardly relegated to the south

While Owens becomes a college track star, shattering NCAA records, another drama unfolds in the American Olympic headquarters in New York as the committee members debate the pros and cons of boycotting the Berlin Games. Citing the Nazi's virulent anti-semitism, committee member Jeremiah Mahoney (William Hurt) pushes for non-participation while Avery Brundage holds the position that beating the Nazis' could be a cogent act of defiance and a way to discredit their claims about a master race.
In later scenes, we see Brundage arrive in Berlin to secure a promise from Nazi Propaganda Minister Joseph Goebbels (a chilling Barnaby Metschurat) that the Reich will clean up its act and support a racially inclusive Olympics. At the meeting is Riefenstahl, who acts as translator for Goebbels. Brundage gets tough, threatening to keep America out of the Olympics if the Minister doesn't comply. Securing a promise, Brundage returns to America. But during another meeting with Goebbels, he forms a business deal that will later haunt him.

Riefenstahl herself butts heads with Goebbels, whose impatience with the filmmaker makes progress on her Olympic film exceedingly difficult.

Owens faces considerable pressure at home from those who believe he should boycott the Games and those, like Snyder, who feel he should compete. An official from the NAACP visits Owens, urging him not to participate to show solidarity for the those suffering discrimination in Germany. Though he actually agrees to the boycott, the opportunity to compete ultimately proves overpowering.

The Games themselves become a showcase for Owens' brilliance as he easily wins the 100 and 200 meter events. But during the long jump, he accidentally scratches his first attempt then fouls his second attempt before the German long jumper, Luz Long (David Kross), offers him a helpful way to avoid scratching the third time. Owens and Long then engage in a long-jumping duel where both break the previous Olympic record before Owens ultimately prevails. Owens thanks Long after and the exchange becomes the basis of a friendship that lasts beyond the games. Though Owens friendship with Long smacks of plot contrivance, their mutual fondness and admiration was, in fact, real, which makes a powerful statement on its own about racial harmony.

Before the American Jewish track participants can compete in the 4 by 100 relay, Goebbels coerces Brundage into striking them from the race, creating another politically sticky situation. Owens is asked to run in their place but only does so after the runners give their consent. His participation in the relay helps the team win first place and his fourth gold medal but it also provides the Jewish runners a degree of satisfaction.

In the final, heartbreaking scenes, we see how more degradation is visited upon Owens when he returns home. At an event in his honor, Owens and Ruth and Snyder and his girlfriend arrive for the fete but before the group can gain access, the doorman prevents Owens from entering through the main door; directing him instead to the building's side entrance.
The incident is but one indignity Owens endured, for the closing subtitles inform us that Owens' achievement wasn't recognized by the American government until 1990.

I found the film to be very entertaining and often very moving. Though I wouldn't go so far to call it an artistic achievement, it still stands as a poignant portrait of Owens and his times. We can credit the filmmakers for not white-washing history with candy-apple revisionism. The film is keen to remind us that America's race relations were no better than Nazi Germany's.
I like that the film broadened its narrative scope to include Brundage's role in ensuring America's participation in the Games without air-brushing his dark dealings with Goebbels. I also think it was inspired to include the making of Leni Riefenstahl's film as part of the story. In defiance of the Nazi Party ethos, we see her celebrate Owens athletic prowess on film as he reenacts his record-setting long jumps for her camera.

What is supposed to be an event free of politics and racial bigotry was anything but in 1936, as Hopkins' film effectively testifies. But it would be a mistake to overlook the compassion many whites in the film felt for minorities, like Snyder, who rode steerage with Owens and the other black athletes during the voyage across the ocean and Brundage, who, in spite of his secret negotiations with Goebbels, did fight for the inclusion of Jews in the games. We also see Riefenstahl's artistic vision remained unsullied by the Reich's loathsome ideas about race.

Race is highly entertaining and a fascinating bit of history. The film celebrates the achievements of an extraordinary man but doesn't shrink from the seamier side of the times in which he lived. The saddest fact we might glean from his story may be that America never fully appreciated the man and his accomplishments. Maybe Hopkins' film helps to keep him in our thoughts.

Horrible Bosses 2

**Spoiler Alert**

Director: Sean Anders/Starring: Jason Bateman, Jason Sudeikas, Charlie Day, Jennifer Aniston, Christoph Waltz, Chris Pine, Jamie Foxx and Kevin Spacey

Yeah, accent on horrible.

You might wince in puzzlement after reading the post heading. Yes, why would I bother with excrement like Horrible Bosses 2 when it seemed like I had nothing but platinum-plated films to review in November? Shouldn't this movie have been assigned a January release? You know what the first month of the year means in American movie industry terms. It is that woeful time in the movie calendar when Hollywood has its own version of a tag-sale; when all the rubbish is discarded; hoping suckers (like me) will shell out green to see flicks better streamed than screened. More on that kind of cinema in January.

So what is my excuse for bothering you all with this nonsense? Well, it does boast a pretty decent cast; Christoph Waltz, Jason Bateman and Jamie Foxx, to name a few and it isn't so bad to see Jennifer Aniston in lingerie and acting randy but other reasons for seeing this film are meager or non-existent. Whew, what a waste of time!
If you didn't suffer the misfortune of seeing the first movie, I won't fritter your precious time with a recap. Suffice it to say Nick Hendricks (Jason Bateman), Kurt Buckman (Jason Sudeikis) and Dale Arbus (Charlie Day) are back from plotting the murder of their terrible bosses and are now poised to make it big with a new invention called Shower Buddy; a device that attaches to a shower head which dispenses shampoo that lathers immediately upon contact. The three men try to promote the product on Good Morning L.A. but Dale gets a bad case of camera fright and the name of their company, which is the trio's first names strung together; sounds vaguely like a racial slur, which doesn't sit right with the African-American co-host.

When the three men demonstrate their invention on camera, a raunchy and mildly amusing shower-scene follows where an unfortunate T.V. camera shot makes it appear Dale is stimulating Kurt with his hand and mouth.

The three hope to find investors for their invention and manage to attract the attention of a father and son who run a successful catalog business. The son, Rex Hanson (Chris Pine) and his father, Bert Hanson (Christoph Waltz), place an order for 100,000 units to market in their catalog. Or so the men think. When they next meet Rex and Bert, the father announces they have cancelled their order and have designed their own version of the device, called the Shower Pal. Devastated and angry, the three men hatch a drastic plan to save their company. Kurt and Dale favor kidnapping Rex and holding him for a $500,000 ransom, which will keep their company solvent. The kidnapping plot involves a lot of noisy, idiotic chatter between Kurt and Dale, who can't seem to filter any numbskull idea that comes to mind. In fact, most of the movie seemed to consist of discordant, ear-lashing, volleys of inane comments between the two. It isn't exaggeration to say I came close several times to plugging my ears. If the noise was unbearable, the fact that it wasn't funny made it more insufferable.

Nick, ever the voice of reason and sense (and lower volume!), struggles to prevent Kurt and Dale's ill-conceived and ill-advised scheme from finding expression but ultimately fails. Part of their plan involves stealing nitrous oxide from Dr. Julia Harris (Jennifer Aniston); Nick's would-be lover from the first film who runs a support group for sex addicts. It is during one of her meetings when the three men sneak into her office.

In another scene that falls flat, Nick is inadvertently drawn into the meeting; believing it to be a gathering of recovering alcoholics. When asked to share an experience, he relates a heavy-drinking episode that just happens to carry homoerotic innuendo.
Why a dentist would conduct such a meeting inside her place of practice seems bizarre but it must have seemed like a good idea to the film's legion of screenwriters. It must have also been a way to have Dr. Harris be involved in a story that has little use for her except to fulfill a male-fantasy role.

When more of Kurt and Dale's lame-brained kidnapping ideas lead the three men to Rex's home, they accidentally inhale nitrous gas and fall asleep inside a closet. The next day they discover Rex inside their trunk, gagged. When they speculate as to how he got there, Rex leaps from the trunk and informs the men he did it himself. They learn soon after that Rex intends to be part of the kidnapping scheme, which the men have little choice but to consent to, given their dire financial situation. Rex asks the men to demand a 5 million dollar ransom, for which they will receive a substantial cut. Of course it seems ridiculous that anyone would agree to such a deal, given their betrayal by the Hansons', but aside from Nick, who voices his reservations, the other two foolishly agree to Rex's scheme.

The plotting and the actual execution of the plan round out the rest of the movie and, as one might anticipate, a double cross and car chase (one of very few inspired moments in the movie) and some more foolishness with Dr. Harris ensue but without much amusement, excitement or raunchy fun. What director Sean Anders' film is is a lot of noise, mostly generated by Kurt and Dale as their stream-of-consciousness yakking vies for ear-time.

The burning question that never yields a satisfactory answer is: why can't multiple screenwriters manage to write a funny script? The bigger, more pertinent question might be: why make a sequel to a movie that, in spite of its $100+ million gross, was painfully dim-witted and forgettable? I think I answered my own question. A healthy bottom line justifies everything I guess; even more sludge.

I think the UN should bestow on anyone who saves people from spending money on junky movies a special, humanitarian award. My few and dear readers, I would like to claim that accolade for myself. I want UN Secretary-General Ban Ki-Moon to recognize Al's Omniflick for its tireless efforts in discouraging movie-goers from sending their hard-earned currency to die in movie house cash registers. Yeah...my blog might one day share the esteem of such notable humanitarian organizations like Amnesty International, Doctors Without Borders and The International Red Cross.

...ZZZZZZZZ--huh? What? Wait a minute; was I dreaming?

Oh well.